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Life is only what you wonder.

Saturday, July 12, 2003

Things That Make My Head Hurt

  • I'm at work and I'm waiting on this little old lady. She got her meal at a super discounted price and a free beverage because she's a "senior citizen". So after her meal she takes her reciept, a slip of paper and one of those little nubby lottery pencils with no eraser and cactulates exactly 10% for the tip.
    Forty-six cents. Which she left in nickels and pennies.
    Forty-six cents?
    She couldn't round it up to fifty cents? It's only four cents more!
    She got a discount. A dollar would have been too much for her?
    Was her income that fixed?

  • I'm walking down the street to the store about five blocks from my apartment. I come to the crosswalk and the "Don't walk" sign is lit, so I stand there waiting for either the traffic to stop or the light to change.
    A minute or so later the light changes, the "walk" sign comes on and I start to cross the street. A woman in a green Honda Civic who's trying to make a right turn into the street I'm crossing starts honking her horn at me, presumably to make me hurry across the street so she can go.
    Was she on her way to a fire?
    Did she have to go to the bathroom really bad?
    She's so impatient she can't wait 3 seconds for me to cross?

  • OK, I'm at the store buying cigarettes. I don't know the name of the asian guy behind the counter, but I've seen him every other day (or so) since I moved into my apartment over two years ago.
    So I'm trying to buy my smokes and out of the blue he asks to see ID.
    Suddenly, after over 2 years he doesn't recognize me?
    Did I loook 10 years younger yesterday?
    Are the feds really crackin' down on underage smokers?
  • I'm going to take some aspirin and lie down for a little while.