<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/plusone.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d3440559\x26blogName\x3dWonder+Boy\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dBLACK\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttp://wonderboyblog.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_US\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://wonderboyblog.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d-9208151565435014371', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>

Life is only what you wonder.

Saturday, February 28, 2004

Do I Know You?

Recently, I went to Leon's for a quick one and as soon as I walk in I spot T.J. sitting across the bar.
T.J. and I were . . .What the hell do I call it?
We weren't "friends" -- not really.
And we certainly weren't "boyfriends".
The proper term is "f-ck buddies" and I guess that's a good of a title as any.
We were guys who were very friendly to one another and we screwed around. A lot.
Not that I hadn't wanted more from it.

At first, our "arrangement" was OK.
Wonderful actually.
T.J. is a really sexy guy and our "encounters" were always exciting and totally hot.
BUT (and it's a really big one) I can't just have sex without feelings building up in me. I'm not built that way.
If it's a one-time thing, sure, no problem! Wine me, dine me, sixty-nine me.
If it happens over and over (and over) again, that's a whole 'nother story.
I don't think of it as a flaw, it's just the way I am.

After awhile I wanted more than just hot sex--I wanted a boyfriend.
T.J. and made it Very Plain when we first began our fling that he wanted no. emotional. attachments.
Not one to flog a dead horse, I broke it off.
When you're emotionally invested in someone and they're not, it's a sign you need to move on. Things can get really messy otherwise.
I'm speaking from experience here.
Trust.

Anyway, he was there. I hadn't seen him in over five years. He was with his new boyfriend and when I walked in his head turned and our eyes met.
Instant recognition. He knew very well who I was.
Then he looked away.
Doris, my favorite barmaid, knew what the score was.
She looked at me and raised her eyebrow. I looked at her and shrugged.
Honestly, it wasn't that big of a deal, really.
T.J. wasn't the first guy I've ever pretended not to know.