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Life is only what you wonder.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Marriage Under Fire Under Fire

While looking through the thrift store for something new to read, Dr. James Dobson's Marriage Under Fire: Why We Must Win This Battle caught my eye.
There was no way I would pay full price for this 120 pages of hard-backed hate-mongering -- but for a quarter, why not?
(This same perversity is what prompted me to purchase -and read- The White Man Is The Devil! from the African-American bookstore Black Planet. A truly compelling book. I hadn't realized I was that evil.)

Dobson's book just perpetuates some of the myths about gay people. For instance, (and I paraphrase) "gay men have an average of a thousand different sex partners in a lifetime", "gay people are sad and unhappy creatures", and "gay people don't really want to be gay, and they could change if they try hard enough".

Here are some quotes from the book, along with my comments.

(page 19) "For nearly sixty years, the homosexual activist movement and related entities have been working to implement a master plan that has had at it's centerpiece the utter destruction of the family."

Huh! News to me. I thought we were just trying to get the rights everyone else has. If there's a "secret society" that's trying to destroy the family, how come he knows about it and I don't?

(page 48) "The introduction of legalized gay marriages will lead inexorably to polygamy and other alternatives to one-man/one-woman unions."

You mean I could have three husbands instead of one! Yowza!
Actually, on second thought, one husband is plenty!

(page 56) "With the legalization of homosexual marriage, every public school in the nation will be required to teach this perversion as the moral equivalent of traditional marriage between a man and a woman. Textbooks, even in conservative regions, will have to depict man/man and woman/woman relationships, and stories written for children as young as elementary school, or even kindergarten, will have to give equal space and emphasis to homosexuals."

The key word in that sentence is "perversion". If being gay wasn't thought of as "sinful", "perverted" or "nasty", there wouldn't be a problem with it being in a textbook, or a storybook for children. There are some people who don't want Sex Ed taught in schools.

(page 60) "Once homosexual marriage is legalized nationwide, laws based on "equality" will bring many changes in the law. Furthermore, it is likely that non-profit organizations that refuse to hire homosexuals on religious grounds will lose their tax exemptions. Some Christian colleges and universities are already worried about that possibility."

And that's a bad thing? In my opinion, if you refuse to hire gay people you should have your tax-exemption taken away.

This just goes to show that you can be educated and fairly intelligent and still be prejudiced.
If someone has it in their head, because they've been taught all their lives that, say, left-handed people are evil, sinister, or disgusting, no amount of debate or persuasion is going to convince them otherwise and you're wasting your breath even trying.

My defense of gay marriage is a personal one, for the following reason(s):

If it weren't for us being "married" (exchanging the rings, vows, etc.) the husband and I probably wouldn't be together right now. If we were just "lovers" who "lived together", all the crap that we've been through would have broken us up inexorably on several occasions.
It was the ideal of marriage, the belief we had when we exchanged our vows, "for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, for better or worse, for as long as you both shall live" that's kept us together and made us try to work things out, instead of going the easy route and giving up, packing up, and moving on.
It was our commitment to this "marriage", and to each other, that's kept us together this long.
And for the most part, we're happy.

And let me just say one thing more, and then I'll shut up.
I have been married to my husband for nearly six years.
No, it's not "legal". The state of Maryland doesn't recognize it as "marriage", but the both of us think of it as "real" and that's all that really matters.