Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Friday, August 11, 2006
You know it has been one of THOSE weeks, when...
You know it has been one of those weeks when:
1. You get up in the morning to go to work, and it 12 in the afternoon and your workday started at 7am.
2. You get stopped at a random police checkpoint, and it is the one day you forgot your wallet.
3. You open the garage door to get your car out only to find that the flat you got fixed the day before mysteriously caused the tire in the front to go flat.
4. You try to pay for lunch and your debit card's magnetic strip is damaged, and who carries cash with them anymore.
And last but not least,
5. You know it is one of those weeks when you meet three boys the same night, and accidentally schedule dinner with two of them the following evening. And they both call you up and cancel in the afternoon.
Alas though, the week is gone, those experiences are nothing but a mere memory, and my pal Wonderboy has always told me to look for the silver lining in all the crazy stuff that happens to us.
Like, the police saw the flat tire and told me to go get it fixed, and never did check my credentials. And the two boys that cancelled on me--both called me back the next day to reschedule. And I was just enjoying the mere fact that I had some numbers to put in my cell phone, it is about time I am in double digits.
Thanks for reading my entrires, I know I dont have one-tenth the talent my Wonderboy buddy has in the writing thing, but I am enjoying the opportunity to write.
Thursday, August 10, 2006
FROM: THE DOG
Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?
Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?
Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the Chrysler Beagle"?
Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?
Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beeper s, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths What do humans understand?
Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?
Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog.
1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.
2.. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.
3 I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box, although they are tasty.
4. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.
5. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. Neither are Mom and Dad's laps.
6. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
8. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration.
9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
10. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello".
11. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.
12.. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.
13. I will not throw up in the car.
14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.
15. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch when we have company.
16. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.
And, finally, my last question...
Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Time to retire the old Mustang
It is Fireguy again, and I am going through the automobile blues.
Anyone know what it feels like to watch the inanimate object that they spent so much time with die a slow and horrible death?
Well, I am beginning to know the feeling.
Living out here in Phoenix has taken its toll on my poor old 1998 Silver Mustang.
It has 162,233 miles driven on it and all mine.
And I started to think about the amount of time I spent inside it and where it has taken me in this wonderful country.
Here is my thought on the time:
If I drove each mile in a minute that would be 162, 233 minutes of driving time at 60 miles in an hours OR
1. 162,233 divided by 60 = 2704 hours OR
2. 67.5 full-time 40 hour work weeks of driving time
WOW, what a lot of driving in 8 years.
Then I thought about the last eight years of life and you know, that car has taken me from my birthplace state-NJ to my first Federal career in Texas, to Indiana, to Phoenix, to Atlanta, and back to Phoenix where I now reside stil working in a Federal career.
And it never let me down until I got here to Phoenix, where I had all of the repairs:
The air conditioning was fixed twice and is about to go a third time, the clutch was repaired, and the battery died twice already in two years.
And, I know what you are thinking, cars wear out, so what no big deal, it is like that white tshirt that is old, buy a new one.
But you know it doesnt feel like that to me, and it saddens me to know that my Mustang wont be my vehicle too much longer.
Because no matter what I do, it is gonna go, no matter how much money I dump into it, it is gonna go, no matter how many battery transplants or oil transfusions ithas it is gonna go to Mustang heaven.
When I think about that, my tears well up but I hold them back because I know that when my Mustang finally goes it will be at peace.
Peace to All !
Saturday, August 05, 2006
My first post
Well, I just thought that I would take a moment and write to all of Jimmy's readers.
I have known him for quite some time, we were together when Princess Diana died. I know that he hasn't been writing real regular, and I am so fortunate to get the opportunity to make an entry on his blog.
So, Hi to all of you out there. I am nestled in the heart of Phoenix, Arizona.
I relocated here from the East Coast for a job promotion. I am employed in our Federal Government, and work very hard for you at giving you good government.
There are many harworking, nose to the grindstone leaders and workers in our Government. I am proud to go to work for and with them everyday.
But, on a different note, none of us can drive on the same road with each other out here in Phoenix, not like the skilled drivers in CA, or back East.
Nope, there are so many different driving styles out here, and everyone does their own thing.
I always wipe my brow and let out a big Phew! when I get to my workplace just 4 miles and 7 minutes travel time away.
And, if any of you follow the news, the authorities have caught the baseline killer.
Well, hope all of you are well, and I will be writing from time to time!